Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Nobody to Vote for and Revenge (US Postal style)

How is it possible that on my first election day as an eligible voter in the state of Maryland there's nothing to vote for? I don't mean that there's a bunch of unworthy and ungrateful candidates and a slew of ballot initiatives that are only going to add to my tax bill. I mean there are NO anything. I have no national elected races, no state races, not even an stinking local race for dog catcher (that would be a fun position to hold though!). I'm sitting here when I should be out at the polls because there is literally NOTHING to vote on today in my district. (A note here should be made wishing Ryan Spegal the best of luck in the Gaithersburg city council race tonight).

I should admit that this development isn't all bad. There are a slew of races (I used slew twice in once post...it's going to be a tag!) in Virginia that are bringing out all the slime that is associated with politics especially the campaign ads. The best one I saw (and I can't for the life of me remember this guy's name) was for a state Senate seat. The candidate is an older guy and they have him dressed in a circa 1973 sweat suit hitting a speed bag which is dusted in talc so every time he hits it, a puff of smoke comes off. The juxt of the ad is that he is "fighting" for his constituents, but the best part is the end when they show him running up the steps of the State House in Richmond as if he were Rocky Balboa. I swear he looked like he was going to keel over dead if they made him do it again. I have a special prize to the first person that can tell me who the candidate is and send me a link to the video!!!

On to going POSTAL, or rather using the US Postal Service to help me get revenge on the advertisers. Yesterday I posted (shame on you if you have to click the link because you didn't already read it!) about Andy Rooney's tips for getting back at telemarketers and junk mailers. Well today I got three in the mail and tomorrow I'm sending three out. Southwest's Visa card department is getting a coupon for a free gallon of milk if they buy any 4 varieties of General Mills cereals (conditions apply), Omaha Steaks is getting a free sample of Glide dental floss (now with the freshening power of Scope) and State Farm is getting a coupon of some sort from Popeye's chicken (frankly it was an hour ago and I don't remember what it's for). The bottom line is that I was feeling stressed and under the weather when I got home but now I feel great and it's all thanks to fat Andy Rooney.

Speaking of fat, I'm still waisting away. Down another 2.0 pounds this week for a total of 6.4 pounds. I've done away with the picture that accompanies this news because of various complaints that it looked like crap. You're right it did so now it's gone. If only getting rid of a certain blogger that you love to hate were that easy.

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