New Donut Ain’t All That and NASCAR Fan

I admit it, I gave in the viral marketing blitz that Dunkin Donuts put on to get me to try their newest flavor, Toffee for Your Coffee. The donut was the creation of a man (Jeff Hagar) in Alabama who won DD’s “Create Your Own Donut” contest earlier this year.

His creation is a sour cream cake donut topped with glaze and chopped Heath® Bar. Now take those components separately and I don’t think anything compares. The sour cream donut is my all time favorite. It’s crunch on the outside and soft and cakey on the inside. Perfect! Then add the crunch of Heath bar brand toffee...can you say “heaven!” But oddly enough these two components didn’t mesh the way I hoped they would have. The result was a fairly dense donut that lacked the crunch that the sour cream or the toffee should have provided. It was almost too sweet and frankly underwhelmed this critic. My message to Dunkin...go back and try this one again...maybe bake the toffee bits into the donut...that might do it.

We’ve spoken in this space about fans of various sports and sport teams (i.e. Redskin Fan). These “fans” just don’t get it. Life does not revolve around their team. In fact chances are there are other teams out there who are just as good if not better and it wouldn’t hurt to at least show some knowledge of them. As it turns out...NASCAR is no exception to this rule. A while back I posted about Fat Tony Stewart and his equally Fat Face. Today I heard from a viewer who had some deep insight into my posting. He (I can only assume it was a “he” from the redness of his neck) posted this comment,

how bout u u f****n b***h

Now I can only assume his redneck status although the use of the letter “u” to replace “you” has some urban connotation to it. I thought it was at least a little classy that he left “stared” out the cuss words. But the bottom line is this is a Tony Stewart fan who doesn’t have the 1) manual dexterity of the fingers 2) the intelligence or 3) the time to type an entire comment complete with firm facts and figures to back up his statement. The only word I can think of is, Talent. Thank you NASCAR fan...you are truly a Jerk.

Tony Stewart...Shut Your Fat Face!

I don’t usually expound on the follies of NASCAR, or really anything about car racing, in this space of journalistic integrity but I can’t resist doing it just this one time.

In a weekend of auto racing where Helio Castroneves won his third Indianapolis 500 (and a $3 Million purse) just one week after finally getting a phony tax evasion charge dropped we should be celebrating the American dream of justice, perseverance, and victory. Instead Fat Tony Stewart had to open his yap at yesterdays Coca-Cola 600 in Charlotte. During one of the several “rain breaks” yesterday, Stewart went over to the pit crew of David Reutimann to complain that they were racing Stewart “too hard.” (see the video here)

Seriously? Racing “too hard”? Tony, do you mean that Reutimann (a nobody on the circuit) was trying to win the race? Imagine that...somebody else on the track is trying to win the race besides you. Oh the horror....the shock...the TRAVIS-SHAM-MOCKERY of it all.

Tony, this may come as a shock to you but other drivers are not going to pull over on to the shoulder of the track, put their hazard lights on, and let you pass them. In fact the whole point of showing up in a car IS TO WIN THE RACE you douche-waffle.

Do you know what the best part of this story is? Reutimann ended up winning the damn race. Tony, Where did you finish? Oh yeah, 28th place. It’s so sweet when karma lines up just right.