Running on Turkey, Tri-ing Harder, and Handicap Parking

Many of you have been asking yourself how I did during the 2009 Atlanta Marathon. What??? You haven’t been asking!? Well start damn it. I have kids to feed! Ok so I don’t have kids...but my dog needs to eat!

Ok calmed down and ready to go. The Atlanta Marathon went ok. Just ok. Sherman steamrolled the South at the end of the Civil War but I think he kind of mailed it in when he got to Atlanta. There are way too many hills. Each time I ran a hill and turned the corner another hill was right there waiting. But the last hill was fun because at the bottom you can see the Olympic Rings (1996) and you know the finish line is on the other side of that hill so you have to run. Along the way I met some interesting people including Sam (guy in the red shirt) who was the loudest person out on the course...scary considering my track record. And who can forget Samantha, our friendly course elf. Overall the race was 26.2 miles worth of well deserved Turkey. And yes that’s a turkey hat on my head. I’m not proud, but not surprisingly the same hat made a few appearances at your area Wal-Mart.


Need a goal to get you motivated? Well I need one and today I took the leap of faith and signed up for the 2010 Nation’s Triathlon coming next September. Now if I can just make it between now and then. I just completed my 19th marathon in 9 years but I have never taken on a triathlon before. Now I need to start training and figure out a few “sprint” (shorter distance) tri’s to get some experience. Let’s get it on.

Finally we go from something that may cause me to walk funny for a while to something that people have to deal with everyday, Handicap Parking. Here in DC, if you have a handicap plate or handicap “tag” for your car you can park free of charge at any metered spot in the city. Free of charge??? Yep. But it got me wondering, especially after seeing at least 8 cars in a one city block with the tags, if these people are really “handicap” or just know somebody at the DMV. I have no problem with the concept of free parking in any legal space for handicap drivers, in fact I think it’s a great benefit afforded them especially after you consider how much money they might have to spend for other basic necessities that we take for granted. But I have been looking at the expiration dates on many of these window tags and noticed that it’s not just good for a few weeks or a few months but rather a few years. A few years???? If the person needs a temporary tag because they are recovering from an injury fine....but a tag that lasts for longer is a complete joke of the system. If you are permanently handicapped you need to have handicap license plates on your car otherwise you open the door to (what I suspect is happening here) fraud and loss of city income. What is so hard about issuing a 3 month tag. If the person who gets the tag can prove (with a doctor’s letter) that they will need more time they can get an extension. If that same doctor’s note says this is a permanent condition then they can apply for new license plates. It’s just that simple. The tag is not meant to be transferred from car to car whenever the driver feels like it. Also it’s not meant for passengers. If you are a handicapped passenger, the driver should pull up to the entrance where you’re going and drop you off! You lazy #$!@#$@#$’s are screwing it up for the rest of us.

Good Day.

Blue Button Pusher

Stop right there you lazy SOB. What in G-ds green earth are you doing? That isn't for you, its for somebody who actually needs it. However knowing the karma train the way I do, chances are you'll be struck by a debilitating disease that will necessitate you buying one shoe longer then the other because of your newly developed club foot.

I know I'm "not being fair" if I don't tell you what's brought on this latest rampage/tirade/diatribe. While walking down the street today I saw a perfectly healthy, mobile woman use those blue, automatic door open buttons that are found on may public buildings these days. They're there, quite obviously to assist those among us who are infirmed, handicapped, or riding into the building on a shopping cart.

They are not there for your fat lazy ass to waddle through each morning with your sausage mc muffin and large mocha grande frappachino with whipped cream. You have two working hands and arms, surely you can figure out a way to extend on of those arms and open the hand on said arm followed closely by closing that hand around the door handle and recoiling your arm in a motion that allows the door to open. And because I don't feel comfortable in your level of common sense, make sure to use your legs to move around the door so you don't hit yourself in the face.

This has been a public service announcement.

POST # 100 - Did you make my list?

In thinking what to post for #100 (check the archives if you don't believe me) I sat and sat and sat some more (my butt is getting sore) trying to think of what would mark this momentous occasion. I have another post coming today on meeting Bill Clinton last night but I really wanted to express my frustrations with many of the people in my life too so I'm going to put the former on hold for a few minutes and continue to regal the little people out there (that's you) with the

TOP 10 People
Who
Piss Me Off

#10: People who wear costumes to places where they don't belong, usually to illustrate a political or social point

#9: People who drive with a dog (or other pet) on their laps

#8: George Bush

#7: People who park in Handicap spaces (with proper tags) but who clearly don't need it.

#6: People who repeat the question just asked of them to begin their answer

#5: Most Children

#4: The Cable Company (Even though I don't have cable this story makes me hate them)

#3: Metro train operators who change the final destination of the train you are on while in mid route.

#2: Matt Lauer and the rest of his Today Show co-horts.

#1: Bloggers that make stupid lists

Enjoy and keep on looking at the stars (it'll make it easier for me to steal your rims).