Monday, January 12, 2009

Mullet Growth Update and Ricky, Ricky, Ricky Goes To The Hall

Attention world, I'm growing a mullet. Yes, that bastion of red necked, Southern, male follicle shaping is currently growing about three feet up from my ass.

It is not an intentional growth mind you. I ain't crazy. But rather I'm in desperate need for a haircut. That is a simple task though, after all I'm a guy... How hard can it be for a guy to get his haircut? Some scissors, a razor, and some talc powder in the hands of a semi-trained, half-blind garden gnome should get the job done.

The thing is I'm really too picky when it comes to this stuff. Part of is that I'm cheap and won't go to some "stylist" who wants a small ransom to give me the latest "Brad Pitt" or "Jonahs Brother's" cut (see I can be hip too.). But it goes beyond paying too much. My scalper of choice also has to have their store front "properly adorned". In other words, I'm looking for a barber pole. Red, white, and blue stripes swirling around and around and around. See the pole (or at least a picture of one in the window) indicates that this is a center of manhood, where men can gather, read a newspaper (and in some high class places an "adult" publication) and get a nice clean cut.

My favorite of these local shops is in the neighborhood of Ballston in Arlington, Virginia. I was all set to go on Saturday right after my run. I drove down to Arlington and was about to head out with friends for a few miles when I realized that a haircut was not in the cards for the day when I realized my wallet was sitting in the warmth of my bedroom dresser. To quote Homer J., "Doh!"

So hear I sit, hair growing a little longer each day and nothing to do but curl up the back a little bit to get that nice rat-tail effect.

I also want to congratulate Rickey on being the best damn Rickey he can be. That kind of daily dedication to Rickey is what got Rickey a spot in the Baseball Hall of Fame today. The best part is that Rickey got in on Rickey’s first time on the ballot. Rickey, Rickey, Rickey. (click the "play" button below for David Cross' take on Rickey being Rickey!)
The Rickey Henderson Bit



The Rickey Henderson Bit

1 comment:

David Ackerman said...

2 points

First, it's hilarious that you praise yourself for being hip as you misspell the "Jonas Brothers"

Second -- www.groominglounge.com