Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Tony Stewart...Shut Your Fat Face!

I don’t usually expound on the follies of NASCAR, or really anything about car racing, in this space of journalistic integrity but I can’t resist doing it just this one time.

In a weekend of auto racing where Helio Castroneves won his third Indianapolis 500 (and a $3 Million purse) just one week after finally getting a phony tax evasion charge dropped we should be celebrating the American dream of justice, perseverance, and victory. Instead Fat Tony Stewart had to open his yap at yesterdays Coca-Cola 600 in Charlotte. During one of the several “rain breaks” yesterday, Stewart went over to the pit crew of David Reutimann to complain that they were racing Stewart “too hard.” (see the video here)

Seriously? Racing “too hard”? Tony, do you mean that Reutimann (a nobody on the circuit) was trying to win the race? Imagine that...somebody else on the track is trying to win the race besides you. Oh the horror....the shock...the TRAVIS-SHAM-MOCKERY of it all.

Tony, this may come as a shock to you but other drivers are not going to pull over on to the shoulder of the track, put their hazard lights on, and let you pass them. In fact the whole point of showing up in a car IS TO WIN THE RACE you douche-waffle.

Do you know what the best part of this story is? Reutimann ended up winning the damn race. Tony, Where did you finish? Oh yeah, 28th place. It’s so sweet when karma lines up just right.


Anonymous said...

how bout u u f****n b***h

RicketyFrog said...

Stewart is a giant doosher