That is When the Big Bucks Start Rolling In

Can I Borrow 3.5 cents?

Please. If I could borrow such a measly sum I just know I could turn it into a princely sum. Then, in turn, I could use that to work my way back to US Currency. To quote Louie Anderson, “... that is where the big bucks start rolling in!”
Last night I was cleaning up some bookshelves around the Casa de Jerk and had an amazing discovery. Deep in the recesses of the second shelf of a three-shelve set up, encased in a plastic sandwich bag was a collection of foreign money. Most of it was that funny stuff they use in Canada, but a few items stuck out to me.
One of them was a piece of paper. The number on the paper said “500”. Wow 500 dollars?? Sweet! Wait...it’s 500 pesos....damn...that can’t possibly worth anything! What a gyp.

But wait, maybe I should check that world wide Google machine just to be safe.
After a cartoon-like double take, I pushed my eyeballs back in their proper sockets and checked the screen again. Yep, it did say that little piece of paper from Banco de Mexico was really worth $34 US. It’s not much compared to the 500 label but come on, it could buy me a few drinks at the bar or a very cheep, ugly hooker for 10 minutes.

The plan was to use my lunch break and take the bill down to the currency exchange center a few blocks from my office. But low and behold, when I got there they told me they don’t even take this bill because it’s so old. 1984 is old? Well ok, I’ll look it up online again and see what the deal is.

Well lookie what we have here This is one of those old “regular” pesos. So that means it must be worth even more then 500, I mean Mexico is such a rich and vibrant economy they send all their workers to US just to “slum it” in our fields, factories, and janitorial positions. What? It’s worth 1/1000th of the face value? That means it’s worth ½ a peso....great...at current exchange rates that leaves me with about 3 ½ US cents. Perfect!

Now if I could only figure a scheme to double my money I could afford a stick of Juicy Fruit (or it’s Mexican, non-union equivalent). Back to the drawing board.