Tuesday, November 2, 2010

For a Good Time Call Jenny

Or Paco is a queer. Take your pick. I’m not sure I understand (or ever did for that matter) why people take the time to write on a bathroom or portajohn wall. What are you hoping to accomplish? Do you really think you’re going to get back at your ex-girlfriend Jenny by putting her number up there? Maybe while I’m sitting, figuring out my life I’ll give her a call and really see if there’s a “good time” to be had.
Of course not! Much in the same way that I could care less if Johnny is gay or the 34th Street Vatos are the toughest gang around.

I could see a time, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, before we had mobile email and text messaging when a person was (to borrow a Kinky Friedman phrase) “hung up on the pot” and needed to take down an important phone number or a message. A pen and a blank wall just felt right. But now? Why would you even write that stuff about Jenny or Johnny when you could Tweet it or post it on Facebook and get even more coverage then the space just above the toilet paper dispenser?

It seems to me that you’re not using the best possible medium for your message. For example, in the Men’s room, even after their morning coffee and bran muffin, you’re still looking at less than 50% of the people coming in to that room are going to the crapper. And of that group a good percentage are reading their blackberry or today’s paper. So at best you’re hitting 20% of everybody coming into the room. And I haven’t even touched on message retention. That will drop your numbers even farther.

Next time you may be better off just buying space behind home plate during the World Series.

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