Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Snow Take Aways and New Years Policy

Look it’s been a while since I’ve posted so you’re going to get four posts this week to catch up after a week plus of being snowed in and traveling. The topics (if you’re at the least remotely interested) are:

Today (Tuesday): Snow Recap/New Year’s Wishes
Wednesday: Inappropriate Valentine’s Day Dinner Locations
Thursday: Austin Marathon Recap
Friday: How Not to Use Your Out of Office Email/Thoughts on Lost’s Final Season

With that said...here we go...

We got snow? Really? Hopefully the 36-48” that well on the greater DC area during Snomageddon (parts II-IV) will accomplish the following items:

1) Teach this area’s residents how not to panic/grow a pair when it only snows a few inches. May school systems actually only delayed opening by an hour or so today. What an accomplishment.

2) People who previously slowed down to 7 MPH when they saw a snowflake may now just slow down to the speed limit to be safe and not gridlock traffic for the rest of us.

3) Remind people that there is a difference between “parking rules for the snow” (the ones that normal people abide by) and “Guatemalan parking rules for the snow” which involves sticking 3 cars in the spaces intended for one. I will remind our friends practicing the latter that when you park all those vehicles in an area where the country plows should dump the snow, they have to dump it in my parking space instead (which is now under 4 ft of snow!)

Also I want to address people who complain that the municipal plows were late in getting to your streets. Do you have a shovel? Do you neighbors have shovels? Put those together and start clearing some of your street your damn selves. The municipality to which you pay taxes to is trying to benefit the greatest number of residents with limited capabilities. If they haven’t’ gotten to your street, how about lending a hand and not asking what your country can do for you. Get digging.

A few years ago I mused about when you can actually stop saying “Happy New Year” to people. The result of a very unscientific poll was on the date of Chinese New Year (actually it’s called Lunar New Year). This year I’ve come back to revisit those results. The answer is still the same. Therefore there will be no change to the official Nobody Likes a Jerk New Year Greeting policy. Thank you for your time

No comments: